Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Doctor Love: Women Are From Venus, Men Are From Mars

While a 20-something guy friend is talking about getting laid, 20-something me is being emotional. These are two different things of course and one is not related to the other but it made me realize how different men and women are even if some women and some men have commonalities. 

A German magazine I read published a scientific study months ago, the study said that we are related to apes –now this is hardly surprising news but what the scientists found is that women and men are more related to apes than to each other. Is it really true that women are from Venus and men are from Mars? Under these circumstances how does one even find the right person to be with if men and women are so different? It is no wonder that some men date other men while some women marry each other. 

On Thinking Too Much

Women have a tendency to think too much when it comes to their relationships –Why hasn’t he called? Why hasn’t he emailed? Does he still love me?

A man would say that there is really nothing to decipher since men are used to straight talk and they will tell you if they like you or if they don’t but often there are grey areas and these are the areas that women dread. These grey areas drive us to ask ourselves a number of questions we cannot answer. One has to remember however that often, women jump into conclusions and often, we just end up hurting ourselves.

If he hasn’t booked the next date or hasn’t sent you an email, he is most definitely not that into you. Do you remember that movie of the same title? There are bits of information women can learn from that movie. If he doesn’t return your calls, it may be better to just leave him be. If he really likes you or love you for that matter, he will do something about it. Don’t go around pushing him or fighting for a spot in his heart because if you have to fight for a spot then it is probably not worth it.

When it comes to how men think, women must understand that men process information in a different manner. Women are global thinkers and take into consideration all sorts of information. Men on the other hand have a tendency to work on a problem repeatedly rather than addressing it all at once. Now these are just tendencies and are not absolute.

Cheaters Never Win?

Men and women are different through and through and I am not just talking about the birds and the bees. According to statistics, 60% of Filipino men cheat on their wives. This study was done in the mid-90s, it must be much worse now. The latter part of that sentence has no supporting evidence though so let's focus on what we know.  

Women cheat too but did you know that being emotionally attached to someone else is also defined as cheating by some women? 

Under Philippine law, a married woman can go to jail if she is seen holding hands with a man other than her husband while a man cheating on his wife must be caught in the act so that the wife can file charges against him. In the Philippines, both in matrimony and in politics, cheaters seem to win.

Tell Me How You Feel

Women are more verbal than men. If you remember Tarzan saying to Jane, “Me Tarzan, you Jane” this practically explains it all. Only very few men can tell you how they really feel. Women on the other hand can voice their emotions pretty easily.

Physical, Biological

No one would argue about the physical differences between men and women. Our physical differences have functional advantages and of course survival value. Men have body strength, have thicker skin that rarely bruise and they have thicker skulls too. This means that calling a man thick-headed is not at all far fetched. 

Men are built for physical confrontation that is why they are more reckless than women. Women on the other hand have more neurons and can access both the left and the right sides of their brains. This is the explanation on why women can multitask while men (who only have access to one side of their brains) have a tendency to solve problems one step at a time. 

Now this leads us to solving problems –any problem for that matter. Psychologist Michael G. Conner found that if one places a group of teenage boys and a group of teenage girls in a maze, the two groups would be solving the problem in a different manner. According to Conner, the boys build a chain of command and in this particular study, the boys explored the maze through the use of scouts. The girls on the other hand did not establish a chain of command and explored the maze together. Relationships among girls have a tendency to be co-equal and the use of collective intelligence is enforced.

The conclusion? We might be different but we can still get along..or not. Agree to disagree maybe? 

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1 comment:

  1. The male and female humans have different roles, just as do all other mammals. Our bodies are designed (or evolved, whichever you choose) for these different roles. The brain is part of the body.

    In humans, men hunt mobile and intelligent protein sources. They defend and expand the territory under control of the tribe. They struggle amongst themselves for status within the tribe, which yields access to women.

    These tasks require coordinated specialized action, intensive mental focus, and an instinctive understanding of the hierarchical pecking order.

    In humans, women gather stationary food, and they care for young children. Women need a relationship with an invested man to survive, be it a genetic relative, romantic partner, or taxpayer.


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