I REFUSE

by Sherry Ann Bautista-Crisostomo


I refuse to be a follower of my fate

I am a master of it.

I refuse to get affected when things go wrong

But I let the tears flow.

It will make me feel better afterwards.

I refuse to accept that things just happen for a reason so let it be.

I am a living magnet

Everything happens for a reason. There are no accidents.

But I should do something to make things in favor of me no matter how

Hard the scenario seems to be.

I refuse to believe that old dogs can’t learn new tricks.

As long as one still has the thirst for learning, one can still make new adventures no matter how old he is.

I don’t believe in pure luck

But I am a believer of blessings and positive thinking.

I value hard work and determination but I am a dreamer as well.

I weave dreams and visualize them into reality.

I value the harsh realities of life but I am a faithful believer who stand by my faith.

I refuse to let fear stand on my way as I get a glimpse of darkness and chaos in this world.

But I pray and pour my concerns to my Master just like a child hold on to his parents’ hands to feel protected.

I am consoled.

I have faith.

I am protected.

I refuse to doubt

I expect miracles to happen everyday, and I can be that miracle too.

I refuse to believe that winning the lottery is like finding a needle in a haystack.

I get excited when good things happen to other people.

I learned to value my hatchets. I learned to throw my ego called Self

And embrace the reality that I am not the best or the prettiest

There will always be better than me, younger than me, more good looking than me, and smarter than me.

But I refuse to be inferior to them.

I am special and I deserve what I have today.

I am not ashamed of who I am.

I am grateful for whatever blessings my Master has given me.

I never forget to share

Nor be greedy to keep and store them.

I am frank.

I share my thoughts, my views, and my beliefs anytime I have the chance.

I am misunderstood most of the time

Including the people I call my family.

I am blessed to find a prince in the form of Mark

We are always in the same wavelength

But we still disagree,

Yet we agree in most of the things in this journey called life.

I follow the norms

But I am deviant in certain rules as well.

I refuse to follow the standards of society because it is the “right” thing to do even if it does not make any sense anymore.

I am Spiritual.

But I refuse to be a fanatic.

I only have my one true God

But I respect other religions.

I am fascinated with the evolution of faith, unseen forces, the spirituality of other cultures and religions.

But I do not embrace all of them.

It is my choice.

I am a firm believer of faith and goodness of one’s heart no matter how

Evil may loom in Gaia or Mother Earth.

I know that the Church does not tell everything.

Many secrets. Truth distorted.

I listen. I grasp. I do not believe everything She says.

I am an advocate of life.

But I don’t agree with the Church in their stand against birth control

I value true love, intimacy, and life long commitments.

I don’t have qualms in expressing my sexuality and sensuality

I am a faithful soul who will only love one man until eternity.

Our body is His temple.

Good things await those who wait.

I am a living proof of that.

I wait for my one true love

I am a romantic

I am blessed to find him in the name of Mark.

Married life is not easy but it is not hard as well

People ask why I chose him,

I did not choose him

My Master chose Him for me!

He loves me

He respects me

He trusts me

He cherishes me

He takes very good care of me.

I love him

I respect him

I trust him

I cherish him

I take good care of him.

We are both Gifts to each other

And we will always be thankful to Him for that.

I get bored easily

But I refuse to complain the humdrum of my life.

I want change.

I get impatient when things seem slow

So I weave dreams once more

And I believe them to happen.

My heart beats with excitement when I read the line from the book: The Alchemist

Where it quoted as saying: “When you want something,

The universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

My friend Kyla said, the book changed her life.

It inspired me and gave me new image of the world I live in.

It gave me a different kind of will power and energy.

I hope

I trust

I believe

That everything is interconnected, yes it is.

That there is a Supreme Being looking upon us

But it is still up to us to be the persons we want us to be.

I refuse to be sad and sensitive anymore

In spite of crazy situations,

It won’t do my family and me any good

I’ll just waste my energy

I’ll make my older one upset whenever my

Temper looms.

I refuse to worry and think about tomorrow.

Or worry about my past to haunt me.

Today is a Gift

I should live life to the fullest

Appreciate what I have

Yet Aspire for a better life.

I am ambitious

But I always keep myself grounded

I want to make a difference

I want change.

I try my best to educate people

No matter who they are

Even if they listen or they don’t

Be patient in explaining things

Even if I have a bad temper

I use my anger or my irritation as a fuel

To be an agent of change

Even if I am just explaining to the gardener not to burn plastics

Or rubbish in our area.

I refuse to flow with the current

Or fear of failure

It is the greatest obstacle to happiness.

I refuse not to be happy

Whatever my situation is

For every happy person carries God with Him.

I refuse to die and never achieve the dreams I weave

They will happen.

I put my energy and focus in believing

In Faith

Everything is possible as long as you want it to happen

No matter what others may say.

I am a gift

I am special

I am beautiful

I am a princess

I am a royalty

I am pampered

I am an old soul

I am a giver

I am smart

I am frank

I am a poet

I am a writer

I am a fashion model

I am a reader

I am well versed

I am witty

I am misunderstood

I am loved

I am a lover

I am a faithful wife

I am a devoted mother of two

I am an advocate

I am a dreamer

I am a positive thinker

I am sweet and thoughtful

I am temperamental

I am emotional

I am a listener

I am a lover of beautiful things

I am a daughter

I am a sister

I am a friend

I am the ME who I choose to be!